photo credit: kevindooley
Depression hurts.
There’s an aspect of physical pain that comes with depression, but it doesn’t compare to the emotional pain that encompasses every pore. Imagine your worst heartache, then multiply it by 1000. That’s how it feels to just get out of bed.
The pain is heartbreaking, it grips your very soul and makes you not want to breath, it rips apart any ounce of self-confidence that you might of had. All you need it a moment, just a moment of happiness, but that moment doesn’t come. And so you’re left drowning in the pain.
You’re own brain becomes your worst enemy. It tells you that you’re not good enough, that you’re bad, that you’re ugly, stupid, worthless, wrong, unlovable.
Bad.
Bad.
Bad.
You feel it in every ounce of your being. You see every mistake, every fault, every flaw. They stand out before your eyes like a spotlight has hit them, to the point where you can’t see anything else. All you know is how wrong you are.
Bad.
Bad.
Bad.
You reach a point when you’re only action is to stop the pain. When it’s all you can think about, all you can dream about. Stop the pain, make it go away, stop feeling like this. You need the hurt to end. You need your brain to be quiet. You would do anything to stop it. You have to do something to stop it.
Depression hurts.
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Jupiter
on Apr 14th, 2011
@ 6:13 AM:
I’m so sorry ,hun.
If you ever need to talk to someone via phone, let me know. Shoot me a message on Twitter or FB and I’ll give you my number.
Lisa B.
on Apr 14th, 2011
@ 11:00 AM:
Yep, I’m there now. Just told my son’s therapist that I had not had any suicidal thoughts for a few months, scratch that answer! I’m sure I would never follow through, my kids need me, but the thoughts are there. The struggle gets so old!!!